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Laura Avery's avatar

You phrase this dilemma so beautifully! I have had cycle where I could be highly self-sufficient in some areas of life and highly dependent in others. I guess it depends what is at plays here. I found over the years, you can become open to certain people, and still strictly refuse the help of everyone else, which can also be a burden in itself.

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Maria Garcia's avatar

Thank you so much Laura! Oh that's such a good point you make - how it can split between different areas of life. That's so well said. And the refusing to accept help only from certain people and how that's a burden is also so true. I have been there often enough myself!

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Diana from Sloppyperfect's avatar

I love your writing!

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Maria Garcia's avatar

Thank you so much sweet Diana, I was having a bit of a difficult week and your kindness really gave me a huge lift <3 I'm very grateful for your support!

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Ali Hall's avatar

Oh I so relate to your words. Self-sufficient has positives and negatives right? And it paints you as the “strong” person who folk don’t need to look out for. We all need people to check in on us, even the self-sufficient ones 😀

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Maria Garcia's avatar

100% there are always positives and negatives with these things! We all need people to check in on us, whether we say/admit it or not!

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Kelly Van de Vliet's avatar

My husband and I were just talking about this last weekend. We both grew up in families who weren't there for us, so we learned to rely only on ourselves. It feels so powerful to be self-sufficient, but for me, it has cost me a lot of time and maybe even some dreams. I think I'm getting better, though, at accepting help when offered.

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Maria Garcia's avatar

I'm so sorry to hear that :( it's so true, the strategies we use to cope with difficult situations can be what makes us resilient, but can also backfire on us. It's so good to learn to balance this, and I'm so glad you both have each other now to work through that and practice accepting help from each other <3

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